Observed friend A after seeing the aftermath of my latest battle with my office plant, Eggberth's, scale infestation (plant soap is a bit messy and requires paper towels, drop cloths, and sundry): "Jesus, M [friend who gets marriage proposals from homeless and insane people] may attract all the weirdos, but you're a magnet for the high-maintenance plants and animals."
So true. They seek me out with pitiful mewlings at my back door. Then they die in my basement.
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