Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Is It That Time Again? Seems Like Just Yesterday We Were Purging Voter Rolls in Florida

In Macomb County, Michigan, the Republican Party will be using foreclosure records to challenge the eligibility of voters. The targeted voters are, it goes without saying, African Americans.

Back it the day, it was just straight up poll taxes and such, but these days, you have to really apply some ingenuity to suppress the vote. I trust the geniuses who came up with this plan are up-and-comers in the party.

And this isn't really related, but I've thought of this project I want to do. I would take something fuzzy and cuddly--possibly a sock puppet or a stuffed animal, maybe a kitten or a puppy--and set it on a stand, behind which would be a video backdrop looping a sunny, morning-in-America speech by Reagan or similar, the crowd cheering in the background. Or maybe I'd splice the fuzzy directly into the video. I can't quite put my finger on the inspiration, but this may have had something to do with it.


I don't think it can be questioned that this wholesome Puppy-American represents the values of heartland America. Unlike those latte-sipping liberals, she knows what it's like to hunt squirrels and pee on trees. Americans can relate to her, or they want to cuddle her. Either way, she embodies more authenticity than the other guy could dream of having.

2 comments:

Toby said...

All joking aside, I'm really starting to get pissed off by the implication that if you don't

1) vote Republican
2) live at least fifty miles from anywhere anyone in his right mind would ever want to spend a weekend
3) think evolution is a ploy to make to your children worship Satan
4) own six guns
5) think America should shoot anyone who doesn't like apple pie, baseball, or speak English (but, you know, not English English)

then you aren't a "real" American. Because, really, if those are the real Americans, then I'm moving to New Zealand sooner than I thought.

Laura said...

Yeah, it's really irritating. It's okay to smack Hawaii for being "foreign," you Manhattanites are godless heathens, blacks are just folks Democrats use to pad out their vote totals when they can't get the real voters, the whites, and it's open season on San Franciso liberals and their values, but the "real" people of this country must never be LOOKED DOWN ON. "Real" people by such definitions comprising about 10 people in Kansas.

It's toxic stuff, and it especially pissed me off when Hillary was employing the divide and conquer, puff-the-egos-of-the-jes'-folks strategy. It's so cynical--try to stoke resentments about the other guy rather than win everybody's votes on the merits.